Caring for elderly parents can put a strain on any person, but if you are caring for your aging parents long distance, you have the added burden of trying to make sure you have caregiver help and that your parents needs are met as well. There is no way you can manage caring for an aging parent, or two, without caregiver support as well as the assistance of a number of other people.
However, you may find that long distance care giving is not as bad as it sounds. Once you get everything into place, especially if you have someone caring for aging parents such as your family, you will find yourself getting into a routine of long distance calls, emails, snail mail, and other forms of communication that work best for you, your elderly parents, and your care giving team.
Identify their specific needs
First of all, you will need to identify just what their special needs are, such as:
- What are their most important health care concerns?
- What are their financial needs and status?
- Are they able to get around on their own or do they need special transportation?
- Do they need an in home nurse?
- Are home services for the elderly available in their area?
- How often can you or another family member visit?
- Do they have neighbors or friends who can make regular visits?
You will want to keep track of such possible problems as their regular eating habits. Are they able to cook their own meals, launder their own clothes, make their own doctors’ appointments and pay their own bills or do you need someone who can oversee those areas of concern? What about upkeep on the house and yard?
If you feel comfortable that they are currently able to care for their basic needs, and only need someone to come in for a few hours a day or a couple days a week, then you will be much better off. If they need constant supervision, then you will need to consider placing someone in a managerial role to help coordinate their care and then report back to you.
Help for the elderly
As long as you can put a team of people together so that if someone drops the proverbial ball there are others that will still keep in touch, you can rest assured that someone is caring for your elderly parents. You can ask others to keep you updated on their condition and have their local friends check in on them every once in a while and let you know how they are.
You can also keep up to date on your elderly parents through their primary physician and any specialists they may need. You can receive regular reports of their visits, and of course you can be listed as their emergency contact.
You can arrange for a home health care service to come into their home on a routine basis to make sure their needs are met. Depending on the area where they live, there usually is any number of services that you can connect with. The only time you may have trouble is if they are in a rural area where there are very few services available. But, if they live in a larger metropolitan area, you will have any number of choices.
Consider assisted living
If necessary, you can have your aging parent(s) move into an assisted living or care center where they will have much more supervision. There are a number of agencies who will provide help for elderly parents, and who will help you arrange a safe place for them to live where they will get the care they need. Many elderly parents are quite happy living in some type of social atmosphere such as a nursing home or assisted living so that they can interact with others their age.
Make sure you are also in contact with a lawyer who has special knowledge of the needs of the elderly so that all proper paperwork is prepared and decisions are made regarding any legal or financial situations that may occur including hospitalization, death and burial arrangements.
It is your call whether you can handle caring for your elderly parents from a long distance or not. If you are able to have everything in place to ensure their safety and their medical, physical, psychological, and social needs are met, then you should be able to have peace of mind that your parents are well taken care of whether in their own home or you have made other living arrangements. Long distance care giving is not for the faint of heart, but if everything is in place, your parents should feel right at home.
2 responses so far ↓
1 Nancy from Lifestation // Oct 28, 2010 at 4:02 pm
Long-distance caregiving is absolutely a challenge. Having someone who is local to look in on the senior, or even as you suggested, to manage the care locally is important, as so many things can come up at the drop of a hat. I also honestly recommend a home medical alert system of some sort, to allow a senior who lives alone a way to connect with someone immediately in an emergency. There are many types, and some are quite affordable.
Nancy from Lifestation recently posted..LifeStation Home Medical Alert System
2 Edie // Oct 28, 2010 at 6:48 pm
Nancy, home medical alert systems are very important for seniors who are living alone. We just never were in that situation, but I know others who have been. It seems like there is a growing number of adults who live quite a distance from their parent(s), and need to find some way to balance caring for them. As our nation becomes more mobile, I’m sure that will continue. Thank you for your thoughtful comments.
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