Elder Care Cafe

Where should your parent(s) live?

· Are they able to stay in their own home with a family member or friend as caregiver?

· Should they move to a family members’ house?

· Can they handle a cross-country move, if necessary?

What are the practical concerns?

· Who has the space?

· Who is single?

· Who is married, with spouse and children?

· What local resources are available?

If married with children, what are the wishes of the family?

· What is the response of the spouse?

· What are the ages and concerns of the children?

· What ground rules would apply?

Hold open discussions prior to the move.

· Brainstorm possible issues.

· Make a list and come up with practical solutions.

· Look at all angles to help ward off future problems.

Beware of making early promises.

· “You’ll never have to live in a nursing home as long as I’m around.”

· “You’ll always have a home with me.”

Such statements open doors to blame and guilt later on if you can’t keep your promise. No one knows what the future may hold, and it’s tough to keep your sincere desires in the face of growing medical and physical problems.

Pre-planning your parents move will save a lot of heartache and expense later. Hopefully, these ideas will get you started. You can always add to the list when necessary.

Have you yet experienced the move of your parents due to age or infirmity? How did you handle the situation?