A number of times on this site we have talked about the stress related to caregiving and how caregivers need to be mindful of the effect stress is having on their body and their mind. Every caregiver needs some kind of an outlet in order to release pent up emotions such as anger, frustration, and rage.
We all know caregivers are a very special group of people, but they are also people who have feelings and needs of their own. Often they set aside their feelings and needs to care for their loved one, at great peril to themselves. One way caregivers can release pent up emotions and feelings is to journal.
Journaling is a form of therapy that will help caregivers cope with their difficult task. Most humans are prone to keeping their feelings bottled up inside. Unfortunately, doing so can lead to stress, which leads to poor health. As a caregiver, you can’t afford to be in poor health, including poor mental health. I know from experience that a healthy, positive outlook and mindset is crucial when caring for another person. In order for you to continue with the important service of caregiver for your loved one, you need tools to unlock those feelings.
Journaling involves getting your feelings out of your head and your heart, and placing them someplace safe. The sheer writing and release of the feelings begins the process of exploration and eventually resolution and stress relief.
Get a nice journal – This is important since you will be writing in it on a regular basis. Choose something that is inviting and upbeat so you look forward to writing. Although many people use a plain college ruled or other type of simple notebook, which is what I use when writing morning pages, having something pleasant to look at will draw you to desire to write. My favorite journal has a quote by Maya Angelou on the cover and I looked at that quote often as I prepared to write. Take a look at a few of these journals to see if something strikes your fancy.
Be consistent – Even if you only write a few sentences, write in your journal daily. Be sure to date it so you can track the changes you are going through. This often becomes important later as you move through feelings and go through trauma with the person you are caring for. Some people write morning pages such as Julia Cameron taught in her book The Artist’s Way, while others make lists or write short blurbs. Whatever you decide works best for you, just Do It!
Don’t hold back – These pages are for your eyes only. If you have had a particularly stressful day of taking care of someone while trying to maintain your family life, get it out. Use that paper as a form of therapy. Those feelings have to go somewhere. You may just avoid other harmful reactions to stress like overeating, drinking, arguing with your spouse or children, or yelling at your sick loved one. Use the journal to vent your frustrations. If you are concerned about others seeing what you write, especially if you let ALL your feelings come out, write that type of journal on loose notebook paper that you can tear up and throw away. You can use other types of journals for your thoughts and feelings after releasing your pent-up anger.
If you decide to journal regularly, some of the benefits to you will include the ability to:
Think more clearly. Get all that stuff rattling around in your head out and down on paper. Once the frustration has left, you can then make informed decisions based on facts, not feelings.
Live in peace. There are so many little irritations during a day of caregiving. Not everything needs to be approached and dealt with. Some things are just bothersome, but they still are weighing on your mind. Get them out on paper and then let them go.
Chronicle a life well spent. When a loved one is gone, it is a record of the good days and bad days of their life spent with you. Don’t only use it to write down frustrations but important and cherished moments you don’t want to forget.
Journaling is therapeutic and beneficial. For caregivers, it is a way to stay sane while doing a rewarding, yet exhausting, service. There are a number of different ways to journal and styles and types of journals you can use. Journal is very individualistic as to how to, when to, and why. Don’t be concerned about the details. The point is to just let go of all the pent-up feelings so that you can better take care of yourself and your loved one.
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